Have you ever heard the saying – “If you want something done, give it to a busy person.”?
It indirectly implies the existence of two Homo sapiens types – doers and no-doers.
A person with a busy schedule is a doer and more likely to get something extra done than a no-doer who has all the time in the world.
Dating is strikingly similar.
Daters can also be placed in the same categories—the doers want something to happen in their love lives, whereas the no-doers only want to swipe and swipe, waiting for that which does not exist.
Most women (and some men) fall into the second category. They lie to themselves that they want something new, but never follow through when it’s time to act.
It’s deadly important to know that:
Many no-doers don’t know that they are such.
They are so invested in the act that even they fall for their fantasy.
For them, the moment is never perfect.
They always have something on their schedule. School, work, gym, eating, walking the dog…
All nonsense.
They are not busy. They are simply time-wasters with delusional content inside their craniums.
Let me ask you a question.
How come one person can have an official spouse, a kid, a full-time job, a dog, a hobby…..and yet still find time to CHEAT regularly? (It happens often, right?)
Meanwhile, single people only have a job and maybe a gym membership, and yet they are always so busy and hard to reach.
They are replying slowly. Scheduling a date is a nightmare. Then the date is super lame – slow, non-committed…it feels as if you are going to the mall with your sister on her period.
Why?
A big portion of single women (and some men) are single because they aren’t T-R-U-L-Y committed to the idea of not being single.
This creates a SCARCITY effect leading to an increased number of affairs.
When single women prefer to stay at home with their cats, and would only go out when Chad is available, the non-Chad male specimens often end up in a situation where they knowingly or not talk/date/meet non-single women.
A guy from work was hitting on the secretary after she showed some signs of interest. Later, she backed off. The guy appeared sad for months.
Right when he was about to leave (he’d worked in the company for 14 years and was exhausted), a woman with an official boyfriend was hired. Being a mega extrovert, my colleague started flirting with her too.
And she was incredibly responsive – more than the single secretary. When my colleague left, they immediately got together.
I intuitively expected this to happen. And by the way, the secretary remained single (at least officially) for many years.
One way or another, women who are in a relationship are showcasing 3 things:
- They want to be in a relationship.
- They dare to start one.
- They make dating one of their priorities.
Single women, on the other hand, tend to stay that way for a long time because:
- They want to be in a relationship but their desire has no real intent.
- They are scared to make mistakes.
- They lie to themselves that a perfect time will come.
I’ve never cheated myself, but I’ve been in weird scenarios confirming the above.
I’ll keep it short:
One time a woman told me that she had a boyfriend during our first date. It wasn’t a way to reject me as she wasn’t opposed to the idea of meeting me again. But I told her to get lost.
At the same time, I was also talking to other women who were single but refused to meet me due to “schedule”.
In retrospect, I realize that these examples confirm the doer/no-doer split described above. The woman from my date was a hypergamous ****, but she was also a doer.
The women who were always busy for me were simply no-doers.
Ultimately, it comes down to the following basic principle:
A Body In Motion Tends To Stay In Motion
A Body At Rest Tends To Stay At Rest
I know that if I fire up a dating app right now, I will see familiar faces.
Why? The no-doer women stay there for years.
Doer women either never end up on a dating app or leave it in a month. No-doer women wait for Henry Cavill to register and like their duck face selfie.
How Does This Defend Cheating?
Well, it doesn’t defend it exactly – it explains it.
I realize now that many men fight for the same woman not because she is so incredible, but because she is available.
If a dude has a ton of options waiting for him, it would be illogical to go for a woman who’s already taken. Some men will still do it, of course, but the number will be slimmer.
At the end of the day, if you want to play ball, you can only do so with the players who show up. And if the good kids refuse to come to the playground, you have only two options – quit or play with the “losers”.
The same applies to S-E-X.
The vast majority of single women would rather remain sexless than have sex with their equals or below.
So, what is the average man supposed to do here?
Given that most healthy men have a very high sex drive – which by the way augments with scarcity – it’s not surprising that many men are willing to deal with women in a relationship in the name of satisfying their sexual needs.
It’s not wise. It’s not smart. It’s not moral. But it’s biologically driven and therefore very strong.
Theoretically, men who cheat with non-single women can control their actions and avoid the affair, but in practice, it’s not that easy and some failure rate is to be expected.
Should men steal women?
A female friend of my sister was happily married to a “nice guy”. There was a financial crisis and the nice guy’s paycheck was cut in half.
Around the same time, his wife (I’ve worked with her too) initiated the beginning of the end.
Long story short, she divorced the guy, left him barely breathing, and ran away with another guy from their social circle.
She married the new guy and as far as I know, they are still together and have at least one kid.
Moral aside (obviously there is very little of that in this story), that woman was a doer. She got married twice and divorced once while many of her female friends did absolutely nothing in the meantime other than register on Tinder and wait for a miracle.
The guy who impregnated her saw an opportunity and took it. What if he had passed on the chance to be with her only to end up single forever? Maybe he wouldn’t have children right now. Or maybe he would’ve met a “better woman” or at least one that wouldn’t destroy her marriage just like that.
We can’t know.
What we do know is that stories like that confirm the cliche – fortune favors the bold.
I don’t like similar situations at all.
And can’t see myself participating in them, at least not knowingly. But at the same time, I can’t close my eyes and ignore the fact that some people are just too inert, slow, and indecisive to deserve a different path than the one they are already on.
Brutally honest article. It has some “hard pills” to swallow, but they are valuable and necessary at certain points of our lives where we give in to complacency and despair.
If you are not naturally extroverted (most extroverts tend to be “doers”), it is worth to “train” yourself into developing/mimicking some of their traits. You most likely won’t ever become a true extrovert (nor like it), but a “fake it until you make it” mindset has higher chances of giving you results in different facets of life than a “no-doer” lifestyle, which sadly is a trap many introverts fall in.
I’m an introvert but like to keep busy.
More of a doer.
Goal setter.
Conclusion: The world’s fooked!
There is no love, people that wait for it, chase the dragon.
Regarding the lady in the story, It reminds me of something that I recently read on Reddit; about a woman who had the most unlucky life: she met her love of her life, her soulmate, his husband. She couldn’t have children, but by some miracle she did have a body with her. Unfortunately he died soon after birth, then her husband died of cancer. She held his husband’s hand till the end and he died with eye contact while talking about their wonderful love story and wonderful moments.
SEVEN MONTHS LATER she decided to get back in the game and she met a NASA engineer (in my opinion waaay older than her) and they have children now.
Yupppyyyy!!
It may not seem like it but this is, for the large part, normal behaviour from healthy women. And men too, come to think of it, but it’s seen more in women. I’m not necessarily taking about cheaters, but mostly about normal women who love men and make the world go around, and spend their time between 24-25 and 30 ish trying to find the best man they can, so that they can get married and have a family, because that is what she wants. Of course this will require some trial and error, should we really expect an attractive young woman during her peak years to commit herself for life to a boyfriend of two years when she can clearly do better? That’s insane, there’s too much at stake. Instead, moving between a few (ideally not too many) boyfriends while working out her place in the pecking order and not investing too much of her peak time in a no hoper seems completely reasonable. There’s only a short window when they are attractive enough to do this and the smart ones know this…because they are healthy minded. It’s the hopelessly indecisive ones who actually do nothing who are the ones who ended up so chronically single they no longer know how to relate to men intimately.
Note that this can all be done without cheating. But I do not begrudge a woman of that age range for keeping her eyes out for a man who is realistically a better fit. It’s just that ideally she would end one relationship before starting the next, and that is a question of character.
Yes, another good article by Truth Seeker.
This isn’t a particularly good time to evaluate humanity or men, since the population boom, safety and the rule of gynocentric societies (end stage wealthy capitalism/socialism) has led to overcrowding and in general, dysgenics. It also cares too much about women because of the simping/overcrowding – another type of reproductive strategy that must be employed when the M:F ratio is too high.
The truth is, we have the worst possible combination of factors of all time if you actually want a quality woman, and even so, marriage wasn’t always the greatest for men. Think of it, women are told they are great, they get spoiled, they have jobs, etc but they’re actually very lazy deep down unless shamed or pushed by the society. They’re the ultimate “I’ll do only what I have to” because that’s their formation – the current society/status quo. Then, they are lied to about their short time of attractiveness, which is basically 16-24.
And people wonder why men aren’t interested in marriage. I haven’t even talked about the law yet … lol
I understand why you think this way but if you close the internet and go out on the street the world looks very different. I assure you that there are many good women out there, but the internet and dating commentary is dominated by the loudest, cheapest, stupidest people of both genders. Of course your perception will be skewed; decent well mannered people don’t put themselves out there publicly so all we see is the worst of humanity there. You don’t see the women who don’t have social media, don’t spend 5 hours a day on instagram, because they have hobbies and the like and don’t consider social media a “hobby” lol. Remember many women these days think that men are all porn-addled losers in their mums basement for the same reason. The internet is a terrible place in this respect and all it is achieving is causing young men and women to hate each other based on the loudest stupidest people and the worst stereotypes. Go outside in the sunshine.