It’s wrong,
and you know it.
You want to rationalize it and sometimes you succeed, but the fix is temporary and superficial.
You know there’s a bug. And every cell of your body confirms it.
Every time you do it, you feel pain, shame, and guilt – that’s a sign that your soul is fighting back.
It’s fighting for its survival.
But you can’t stop.
You’re addicted to it. It’s a virus that’s bigger than you….for NOW.
Let’s end this.
Today.
Here are 5 steps that will help you change course and steer away from your addiction to paying random women on the Internet for erotic images and soulless videos.
Step 1: Admit That There is a Problem
As I said in another article (I don’t remember which one as there are 1000s of them), the true nature of an activity reveals itself after it’s all done.
Allow me to clarify…
If you play video games all day instead of studying, you feel great while doing it, but in the evening – you feel remorse, regret, and self-hatred.
If you eat garbage food, you feel great while doing it, but later you feel like you wanna die.
If you skip your workout to watch a low-IQ movie, you feel nice and relaxed in front of the TV, but later, you feel guilty.
When you give your hard-earned money to random women on the Internet so that you can see their genitalia, you feel a mix of adrenaline and dopamine hitting your capillary system like heroin.
But the next day, you can’t even face your reflection.
You avoid mirrors because you are scared of seeing your own eyes digging into your soul.
Conversely, if you perform a hard workout, you feel miserable while doing it, but later you are proud and happy that you’ve pushed through.
When you study instead of watching TikTok, your brain constantly begs you to stop, but if you keep going, you feel confident and productive.
When you work hard all day on something you love, you feel amazing and sleep like a baby with a grateful smile…
In other words,
- Harmful, destructive activities feel great while doing them but put you in a personal hell later on.
- Productive, constructive, and self-building activities are boring, annoying, frustrating, and tiresome while you do them, but put you in a personal heaven once it’s all set and done.
Your addiction to paid pornography falls within the first category.
And the first step to curing it is admitting to yourself that there is a problem.
Be real with you and admit that there is a problem.
An admitted issue is a 50%-non-issue, they say.
Once you do that, the first and the most important step to recovery is done.
Step 2: Allow Yourself to Be Sad and Angry In a Safe Environment
A lot of people paint anger as a bad emotion that shouldn’t even exist and often imply that if you feel angry, there’s something wrong with you.
This isn’t one of those cases, however. It’s normal to be angry at yourself and the world.
They tricked you. And you fell for the trick. They played with your emotional equalizer and won.
What did they win?
Your precious resources – time, money, energy…
But before all, they stepped on your soul. But let’s not put all the fault on them, you were part of the game too. You were weak and you caved.
So, go to a quiet place where no one can see you and scream your lungs out.
Scream.
Scream.
—- until it’s all out——-
Cry too if you have to.
Let the tears slide along your cheeks.
This method is called “emotional bomb diffusion” and was accidentally told to me indirectly by a therapist.
Why accidentally? (I was getting a sick chest pump while he was talking to some other brah.)
I used this method after being rejected by women brutally.
And it works.
If you suppress the anger and sadness, it could surface uncontrollably. You don’t want that. You want to be in control.
Step 3: Realize Your TRUE Self Worth
Here’s an ESSENTIAL truth that you must internalize as a male:
If you let the world tell you how much you are worth, the number will always be ZERO.
Read that 5 more times.
As I’ve said before, the powers that be look at people as numbers, resources, cash cows, and statistics.
They want to extract everything that you have and give you nothing in return.
Are you going to let them do it?
Are you going to let them sabotage your existence and turn you into a sad cuckold of a human being?
To stop their sick plan you only need to do one thing:
REALIZE YOUR TRUE SELF-WORTH.
And believe me when I say that it’s way higher than those monsters want you to think.
You are worth more than that and both you and them know it. They are trying to hide it and keep you in a perpetual comatose. You, on the other hand, are scared to admit it. You are scared to fight for who you want to be in life.
Let me ask you a question.
When you were a kid and your teacher asked you: “Who do you want to become when you grow up?” was your answer:
I want to be a fatso swine drinking sugary drinks, “masterbating” to weird clips of women willing to do anything in front of a camera for money.
My guess is no.
You see, at the time, your soul was still free. Still capable of dreaming. And then the world happened, and you didn’t push hard enough.
Well, it’s about time for that push to happen because you were DESTINED for more and you know it.
That’s why you are reading that article.
There’s a little voice inside of you that hates seeing a cum-infested sock next to your bed and an empty bank account.
It’s about time you listen to that voice because it’s trying to save you.
And never forget the following:
You weren’t put on this Earth to do this. You weren’t born to spend your finite time watching deranged women slide objects inside themselves and stream the perversion for the entire world to see.
Step 4: Stop Worshipping Women
Here’s an obvious truth and yet rarely said in this crazy world.
Women are not better than men.
And yet that’s how men are encouraged to behave.
When you are exchanging your time and money for her nudes, you are exercising a form of unhealthy worship.
You’ve been conditioned to believe that you are worth less than women. That they are essentially deities.
They are neither deities nor better than you.
That’s an inherent truth as old as the Sun.
Can you please point me to a sacred book that says “men < women”?
Can you please give me scientific evidence indicating that men < women?
You won’t find any. And no, “new age” articles or YT videos don’t count.
If you want to worship someone, worship God, not women.
Respect them when they deserve respect (posting nude pictures for strangers doesn’t qualify), but never forget that you aren’t beneath them.
You are a child of God, just like them.
Step 5: Set an Achievable Goal and Run After it
The advice above is phenomenal if you follow it, but we need practicality too.
Too much talking, too much philosophizing, too much reading, too much listening leads to stagnation.
Doing is the necessary catalyst.
And the best way to start digging yourself out of the hole is to set an achievable tangible goal.
Goals such as “I want to be rich.” don’t meet the criteria. You need more specificity.
Think more like: “I want to earn enough money to buy a better car. I also want to add 1cm to my arms.”
When you don’t add numbers/specificity to your goals they remain DREAMS.
When you have a realistic number to fight for, the goal is a half-reality already.
Don’t shoot for the sky. Shoot for reality.
And by the way, it’s even better if the goal is meant to help someone you love.
It’s weird. But sometimes it’s easier to do things for others than for yourself.
When you are doing it for your loved ones, you gain enough courage to go through walls.
When you are doing it for yourself, you try to talk yourself out of it.
+ Bonus
Step 6: Don’t Self-rationalize Addiction
A while back I read a twisted comment online. Some guy with the same addiction was rationalizing his misery as follows “It’s only entertainment and I am paying for it.”
No, it’s not “entertainment”.
Do you feel like someone stepped on your soul after watching a football game?
Do you hate yourself after playing darts?
The answer is no.
So, don’t act like this is normal. That’s the demon inside of you speaking. And that demon has to be suffocated.
+ Bonus
Step 7:
Make one step at a time
Don’t think about the final destination.
Don’t think about the past.
Don’t think about tomorrow. It’s gonna come and it’s gonna go.
Don’t think about the “lost opportunities”. It happened and there’s that.
Don’t think about “what could have been”.
Don’t feel unnecessary shame.
Don’t hate yourself.
Instead, focus on getting it right TODAY.
A day is only 24 hours. During some of them, you sleep. So it’s even less than that.
All you have to do is survive for 15 hours.
Do it one time. And then repeat….repeat…repeat.
It’s a cliche, but it works better than anything and is the key to fighting any addiction.
Good luck, my friend.
And when we meet one year from now…I know that you will be able to look in the mirror and smile.
But for now…just take it
One
day
at
a
time.
This post is also available in “narration form” on NattyOrNot.com’s YouTube channel:
Great post, Truth
Listen up people. And go day by day, present fights … there is no past and there is no future, except what you make of the present. That DOES include being judicious, disciplined and having a plan that can take form later, but things must be done now, with an order in order to be in order in the future. Got it? Good. Get it.
Most of the time it’s best if you don’t know your future.
If it’s going to be good, well…you will enjoy it.
If it’s going to be bad, you will lose the present too…torturing yourself thinking about that misery that’s coming.
But overall, life is pain with brief moments of joy and peace here and there.
powerful words>
just what I needed in this manhating society.
@TruthSeeker, do you think it’s the same with video games?
I try to rationalize it by saying that I have to play because my life is boring because all I do is go to work then to the gym. But am I just screwing myself over life the OnlyFans addict?
I don’t think video games are nearly as bad as OF addiction, especially if you do your work and go to the gym.
We are not robots. The nervous system needs to rest. You can’t always be “on”.
So, unless they are eating your life, I don’t consider them bad.
If I wanted to masturbate watching free videos I don’t think it would be a problem, sometimes a sexual relationship is more unpleasant
Good to see that you have a reasonable view about videogames unlike other content creators who have an irrational bias against them.
IMO, they can be seen as a kind of mental alcohol. In small doses (or big ones only in a few especial occasions if you can afford them) is fine as a way to relax and let off steam. The problem only comes when you lack the self-control to limit their use and put them over things that are more important in your life.
Also, the kind of games you play matter a lot too. Playing an online multi-player shooter or RPG specifically designed to get people hooked with any kind of tricks is not the same as playing an offline story/world-building driven game with a slower pace.
As one psychologist I watched recently said, most modern addictions (videogames, social media, etc) are more an issue of shitty habits than of the source. In fact, the quantity of dopamine a screen produces is insignificant next to the addictive power of an actual hard drug.
At the end of the day, everything that we use to distract ourselves from the present is evil!
Life is not supposed to be all about chasing cheap thrills.
Thank you for the appreciation 🙂
one of the best posts, by the way, did you become a Christian?, and what exercises do you recommend for legs at home and which ones do you do?
Thanks for the post, we need more posts like this
Technically, I am a Christian, but I am not the most practicing one so by many people’s standards I won’t qualify as such. That’s just the reality.
Training legs at home is not the most productive, but here are some possibilities:
– Bulgarian splits squats with the front foot elevated for extra ROM – this is a very hard exercise – you can make it harder by holding two DBs.
(what I don’t like about it is that it takes too much out of your CNS and overall system because 2 sets technically equal one)
– Skateboard squats againts a wall (Scooby style) – it’s an ok quad dominant movement
– Goblet squats with the heels elevated for extra quad activation
– For the hamstrings, you can do sliding leg curls with furniture sliders under your feet (Ross Enamait made that popular back in the day)
– You can also do DB Romanian deadlifts on a platform for extra stretch and extra range of motion.
1. I’m glad to see you’re a Christian, don’t let this sick society change who you are and I see you don’t, that’s good
2. thanks for the exercises
Hi Brother,
When you became a Christian?
I was baptized at birth technically.
the smart learns to deal with the negativity in life, by just laughing at it and realising that fear will always be a part of a human during his life.
its a constant trial of facing test, someone with discipline and that keeps to his morals which he by nature is born with, like having shame (say no to porn), manliness (no to lgbtq, no to lowering your value/morals for a women), will live far better of than those who fail (and will realize afterwards anyway)
a human needs to realise that his whole stay on life from beginning till elderly is just by facing tests, with this comes negativity and stress, facing the tests with the aim to sovle them and being able to be relaxed at the same time is key to succes, once you realise how better off you are compared to some other people around you that had no self-control,moral,faith . you will realise how far accomplished you are in real life compared to them and the ease you have in life compared to others during your short stay
the Quran says:
(21:35) Every living being shall taste death and We shall subject you to ill and good by way of trial, and to Us shall all of you be eventually sent back.
Truthseeker, what is your opinion on the Islam
Good stuff as always TS, damn you have been super busy! On a side note, thanks for the new arms book. Just great, great, great stuff, really sparkle of motivation for me after a long time of lost motivation. And you said in the past that your speciality is demotivation 😀 But honestly. from a motivational perspective it would be very interesting to hear how have you been able to write so much lately.
When it comes to addictions, they are slippery slopes. I’ve been addicted to many things in my life. Longest was coffee. I’ve also been addicted to smoking for a relatively short period of time, but it was super difficult to stop it. I think that some addictions have the potential to have positive influence on one’s life, but these are super hard to judge, especially objectively.
For example, my friend has often said that she is jealous of my exercise addiction (or habit). It’s like I HAVE to exercise pretty much daily, not necessarily hard, but at least do something. And if I don’t, I feel like shit. But in my mind, I’ve wasted enormous amount of time and energy to exercise and sports, but nothing really valuable has ever come out of that addiction. Maybe biggest positive has been the mental health benefits. Still, I’d rather have her compulsion of cleaning, that would have been much more useful addiction in life.
Good comment Sam
I will retain those words .
very good comment Sam.
Well done.
Thank you for the support, man.
Sometimes I just get burst of energy and use them. I know that it won’t last forever, though. Sooner or later, the “doomer period” comes for me.
And that’s fine. People will get tired of me anyway and need to rest haha.
What you describe is somewhat normal. I’ve done a 6 times a week routine for 9 months already and sometimes I truly feel like I am wasting my time (I am from muscular gains perspective.)
But I do feel nice after completing the workouts. My workouts are short and to the point.
Chest
——
Incline DB Press – 7 sets of 8-12
Pullovers – 2 sets of 12
Incline curls – 3 sets of 8-12
Back
—–
Deficit T-bar rows – 3×8
One arm rows – 3×8
Triceps – Overhead Ext. 5×8-10
Biceps – Incline curls – 3×8-12
—————
Legs
Hack squat 3-5×8-10
Leg curls – 3-5×8-12
Calf raises – 5×12
And I repeat those workouts 2 times per 8 days.
Sometimes I introduce a mid rest day as my system gets tired and needs a break. If you have a tired CNS, you can’t produce the necessary intense muscular contraction.
Great to see you having the energic period, it really is infectious. Although I like the doomer periods too 😀 But while the positive thinking and “The Secret” kind of things are mostly shite, there still is something in positivity that carries. That being said, my moods are like a rollercoaster ride. Only thing that seems to balance it for me is staying active and trying to live a healthy lifestyle most of the time. I honestly thought for many years that I was after muscle and might, but it seems that the biggest benefit of exercise for me is that it keeps my brains bright. I don’t even know if that’s a real sentence but it almost rhymes.
You have an impressive streak going on with your training. After a stupid injury I have now being doing mostly only pullups, dips, pushups, Bulgarian split squats, calf raises and kb swings for almost two years. I guess I’m not very creative anymore, if I ever was 😀 I cut off some weight in 2023, and I think I look ok at the moment, at least for my age. Albeit the bar is not set very heigh. But maybe those handful of exercises did something to keep at least a little bit of the muscle.
The CNS’s effect on training is something I probably haven’t properly thought of before. I read your new A-R-M-S book and I did an arms specific session two days ago,. It was really good to skip the compound stuff and target the arms straight from the beginning. The bigger moves really drain something, or a lot, especially if you’re trying to focus on something else. Oh yeah, almost forgot a thing about the book, I’m ashamed to admit that drag curl was new exercise to me, good stuff.
At the end of the day, the most important thing is to “just do something” consistently. And that’s what you’re doing.
Thank you for the support. I am happy that you still find my content useful.
Yes, if you want something, the fastest and surest way to get is to focus on it rather than expecting to get it via a proxy. I am a torso lifter (long arms) and my upper body lifts are chest, lats and traps dominant. In similar cases, direct arm work is simply needed if you want to max out that muscle group.
I hope you see results soon.
Dude don’t you ever even think to sell this website
Is it okey if i do this routine but 3 times a week?
Do you incorporate cardio to your routine?
What is your diet at the moment?
Great post as always. Grettings from Argentina.
It’s sad that we’ve reached a point where this kind of article needs to be written.
But, to be honest, I think this is not something as new as most people think. Decades ago, the OF equivalent were porn movies and magazines that, surprise, significant portions of men were also addicted to and were willing to spend money for it. It could be argued though that Internet worsened the issue by making porn more accessible than ever before.
Personally, it is beyond me how some people can only get sexual stimulation watching that kind of material (or with an actual person of the opposite sex in front of them). I guess I have some kind of superpower because when I masturbate occasionally I don’t need to resort to porn lol
Are you a Christian? Truth seeker?
Not as much as you.
Sexual stimulation