I had an hour or two to kill and decided to visit the mall nearby. The tropical weather outside trying to set my hair on fire kinda pushed me in, to be honest. The fellow humanoids coming in and out of the polished glossy stores appeared happy and content to live a dream that somebody […]
It was only 2 o’clock in the afternoon, but I was already exhausted from hours of hard clicking on my dusty keyboard which had a few missing keys and a left CTRL button working past retirement. The repetitive motions were making it very difficult to keep my eyes open and continue this brutal keyboard exploitation. […]
Holidays are overrated. Why? First, you need a holiday to recover from the holiday. Second, a week is just not enough. Before you know it, you come back, restart the machine and spin the wheel for the rest of year. The holiday drama reminds me of the widely spread idea that your prom night is […]
Two years ago, I had the displeasure of working with an advanced level CrossFit bitch. The experience taught me a lot about both – bitches and CrossFit. First, what’s a CrossFit bitch? A CrossFit bitch is a female specimen sharing all characteristics of a total bitch while also doing CrossFit training multiple times a week. […]
For many years six pack abs have been a major symbol of the fitness industry. The human society has been convinced that having perfectly ripped abs reveals physical excellence and loads of sex appeal. There are two main reasons why ripped abs look so fascinating to the general public. First, visible abdominal muscles represent a much […]
I did my first chin-up at 15. My gym teacher, better known as Conan the Barbarian, was a crazy bitch with wild clotted hair that made all boys chin and dip that day. One could only wonder what had happened to her the night before. I got one chin-up repetition with the help of every […]
Dedicated to the guy who sent me 29 messages entitled “How much do you squat, moron?” I was sitting at my desk, eating acne inducing food when suddenly something in me broke, and I gave up all resistance. “This is it. I am going to the gym. I want to get big.” “This is it. […]
Once I started this journey, I was immediately trapped in the net of the industry like a complete tool. Eventually, I understood that the majority of the info out there is half-dirty. There are some good ideas, but about 50% of the stuff is crooked for various reasons. That’s how I came up with the […]
Today was no different. I started the computer and launched YouTube only to see another permabulker suffering from an inflated ego trying to convince me that squatting is as complex as a heart transplant. “You have to keep your back as tight as possible when you squat,” said Mr. PermaBulk. Thanks, man. Nice tip. Until […]
The number of crazy things that I have seen in this muscle game can cause serious brain damage and lower your IQ really fast. If there was therapy for that, I would probably pay to get it off my chest. Luckily, I can get away with it for free by just sharing some of this […]
There’s nothing magical about training splits despite the enormous amount of attention that they receive. Persistence rather than “the perfect training split” is the engine. You can follow a subpar training routine and still do very well if you just keep pushing. Below are a few training splits which you may find useful depending on […]
The functional training community is not nearly as innocent as many of you think. It has contributed greatly to the enormous amount of delusional beliefs found in the muscle building sector. Below I have listed a few major unrealistic ideas supported by the so-called functional training camp which includes the following branches: 5×5 zealots kettlebell […]