Many say that the Internet is a fake reality full of lies and advise people to ignore it.
It’s obvious that this statement is true, to a certain extent. But the painful truth is that the Internet is more real than some people might want it to be. And I can easily prove it.
Social media is like fast food – everybody criticizes it and then buys it.
Many people post memes ridiculing social media and yet when I click on their profiles, all I see are tuned pictures and non-stop posts. If you don’t care, why you care?
One of the common criticisms is that people’s social media life is fake.
Well, I actually disagree greatly with that. Social media lives are real.
Once upon a time, I talked to a woman, and we exchanged our social media contacts. During the summer, she was posting daily stories from her trips. She basically spent the entire season going from one cruise ship to the next.
So, how is her life fake? Was she traveling? Yes. Was she ship hoping? Yes. Is she rich? Yes.
The same can be applied on a much higher level. For example, famous people like CR7 would post pictures of their trophies, which are obviously real, and overall luxurious lifestyle.
Meanwhile, a basement dweller would post practically nothing apart from some conspiracy YT video theory or a depressing song.
Thus, the profile of the basement dweller would also be a fairly accurate representation of his status and overall existence.
The counterargument is that people only focus on the good side and hide the bad.
That’s true but doesn’t change much. A king is still a king and a peasant is still a peasant.
Here’s a story: I have one picture on Facebook on a mountain peak. I was there with my parents. We had a heated argument on the way. The dispute wasn’t pleasant and made me sad. But I am smiling in the photo.
Am I faking it? No. I was happy when the picture was taken.
The dark side of the coin may be hidden from the photo, but it doesn’t negate the positive one.
It’s no different than dressing up when you’re going out.
Imagine the following:
- You dress like a garbage man at home – clothes with massive holes and nasty pigmentation.
- You put on a billion-dollar suit when you go out.
Do the nasty clothes that you wear inside negate the power of the suit?
How would you respond if someone says: “Nice suit bro! But you wear stained rags at home so it doesn’t count!?”
Exactly. You get the idea.
People often want to present social media lives as fake to make themselves feel better about their ordinary existence, but the stone-cold reality is that our profiles often showcase more of us than we think.
It’s also true that some people truly have a happier, more fulfilling life than you, and their social media shows it.
Do some people fake it? Many try. But if you have experience, you will see through the lie.
“Dating apps aren’t real life,” they said.
There’s this notion that dating apps aren’t representative of the “real life” dating dynamics…that if you go offline you will succeed.
My experience confirms that idea. The women that I’ve met outside of a dating app have always been on another level in comparison to my Tinder dates.
However, there’s a twist. (Just wait for it.)
There are 5 main ways to meet a woman:
- Dating apps
- Social media (unofficial dating apps)
- Cold approach (opening random women on the street)
- Warm approach (opening co-workers, friends of friends…etc.)
I’ve used the first three methods exclusively.
My dating app dates were the most difficult to secure and also the worst. In fact, I can say without hesitation that I’ve never had a meaningful date from an app.
I used Tinder primarily, and it would take me quite a while to even get a somewhat decent match let alone a date. The women that I met through the app embodied strong entitlement and behaved condescendingly towards me.
The women that I met through cold approach were way better in terms of looks and behavior. They were not only prettier but also more interesting and less judgmental.
Based on this data point, one can conclude that offline dating is always superior. I would have done so myself in the past until I tried social media for dating specifically.
I used Facebook because Instagram is hard to see (small circles) and has a subpar search for people.
My Facebook dates were practically on the same level as my cold approach dates. I met just the type of women that would be responsive to my cold approach efforts.
My explanation is as follows: dating apps filter spoiled individuals and encourage them to treat others as disposable units.
Conversely, social media is broader and connects you to a greater number of people in a more natural “digital” habitat.
That said, dating apps reveal the real dating dynamics.
Or in other words, your success or failure on dating apps is an indication of how easy or hard it will be to secure dates in real life too.
If you have a hard time getting a date from a dating app, you will also have a hard time getting a date from social media and cold approach. The only difference is that the women will be of better quality. The effort, however, is the same.
If you’re a “Chad” and rule dating apps, you will also rule social media and cold approach.
If you’re an average person who occasionally gets a date through Tinder, the same happens through the other venues.
Are online friends real?
It depends on what you expect.
Imagine the following situation: You play a game. You start chatting with another player. Eventually, you exchange contacts and talk on social media too.
You share deep philosophies, emotions, observations…etc. over text. You feel really close to one another.
Are you friends?
You’re digital friends – nothing more nothing less.
If tomorrow something bad happens to you (e.g., you get hospitalized), will that person help you? Will you help him if the roles were reversed?
Probably not. And a huge part of the problem is logistics related.
If you both live in different countries and never meet, sorry, but you cannot be true friends.
A textashionship is a digital relationship that amounts solely to texting. The involved parties talk a lot but never make a conscious effort to meet even when living close to one another.
I’ve been in two textashionships.
The first one was with a friend from high school. After graduating, we tried to continue communicating, but he refused to ever meet me even though I was working close to his home.
Were we friend at that point?
Not really. Just texting morons.
The second was with a former colleague that I’ve known for 10+ years.
To this day, I talk to her (in a non-romantic way) but haven’t met her in real life in many years.
Are we friends?
Not really. Just texting morons.
The truth is that online lives are real and a surprisingly good reflection of your offline life.
Having said that, an existence that’s heavily based on digital experiences (texting, social media lurking forums, YouTube, video games, Tik-Tok…etc.) feels empty because it’s dehumanized.
If tomorrow was your last day on Earth, would you spend it online?
Personally, I would log on and say goodbye to my digital friends, but this won’t take me more than 60 minutes. It will be this long only because I will try to write something interesting.
Then, I will go out, talk to my family if they’re still here.
If I am completely alone, I will talk to a stranger.