All You Need To Know About Bodybuilding In One Article

1. Lifting weights causes micro tears. When you rest the tears recover as the body synthesizes new muscle. As a result you get bigger. Grats.

2. Rep ranges and sets are not as important as total workout volume.

4. You need sufficient amount of protein and calories to build muscle. Training alone is not enough. You can’t build a house without the right material.


5. You don’t need as much protein as the supplement companies are telling you. Unless, you are very tall and very big as a natural bodybuilder you will rarely need more than 150 grams of protein to grow.

6. Natural bodybuilders see the fastest body composition changes when they stick to low carb diets.

everything-you-need-to-know-about-bodybuilding-steroids

All you need to know about bodybuilding in one article.

7. Whey protein, creatine, glutamine and BCAA are largely overrated supplements and you don’t need them unless your jaw is broken and you can’t eat solid food.

8. You can’t build muscle and lose fat at the same time unless you are on steroids or you’re a beginner just starting out.

9. The best exercises for chest are: dips, bench press, push-ups. Flys, cross-overs, pec decks and machines suck and only cause shoulder injuries.

10.The best exercises for back are: pull-ups, deadlifts, rows. All other exercises are usually some form of those 3.

11. The best exercises for legs are: squats, sprints, leg press, Romanian deadlift.

12. The best exercises for arms are: dumbbell curls, dips, close grip bench presses.

13. 99% of the people advertising supplements are on steroids.

14. You don’t need cardio to lose fat. Caloric deficit is what’s really important.

15. As natural bodybuilder you cannot expect to gain more than 20-30 lbs of real muscle during your career.

16. Bodybuilders don’t make a lot of money.

17. Most bodybuilders do G4P {gay for pay} to cover their drug expenses.

18. Most training routines are pure bullshit full with hype and overall lack of intelligence.

19. GOMAD makes you fat and farty.

20. Low bar squats are not really squats, they are cheated good mornings.

21. There is no such things as professional natural bodybuilding.

22. The reason why bodybuilders today are 60-70 lbs bigger than Arnold’s time is that they’re now using insulin and growth hormone.

23. Steroids are not always bad. They could do you good but most people don’t actually need to use them.

24. Bodybuilders are insecure and most of them are big sissies covered with fake muscles.

25. Kettlebells are no special at all. Just another marketing tool. They’are not even as Russian as they say.

26. The bench press destroys shoulders because it’s an unnatural movement for the scapula and most people do it wrong.

27. Side lateral raises are among the most ineffective exercises ever.

28. Most people who think they are 10% body fat are often 19% body fat.

29. Most people who are natural and 5% body fat look anorexic and fragile in clothes.

30. All fitness models that make money with their bodies are not natural and take Trenbolone, T3, Clenbuterol and even growth hormone.

31. If a woman looks like a man, she is not natural.

32. The packaging and the labels of the supplements you buy cost more than the actual content.

33. Bodybuilding is a worship of oneself, therefore it’s narcissistic.

34. Professional bodybuilders remain forever on HRT in order to feel normal.

35. For yet to be known reason the abuse of anabolic steroids is the reason why most professional bodybuilders have only daughters. If you investigate, you will see that most pro bodybuilders who are fathers have only girls. Ronnie Coleman, for example, has over 5 children (hard to know the exact number) and they are all girls. Since the sex of a child depends on the male we all know the reason is the father’s drug protocol.

36. Bodybuilders pretend to always eat clean but the truth is they eat junk food constantly.

37. Steroids are very effective for building muscle mass and the main reason bodybuilders look the way they do.

38. The HIT method sucks for most people and only causes CNS burnout. Even Mike Mentzer himself did not use it to build his physique. Rumor is he did 12 sets per body part but only counted the last two as working sets.

39. The money in bodybuilding comes from the noobs buying supplements and going to pointless seminars. Another source of income is illegal distribution of anabolic steroids and growth hormone.

40. The winner of Mr. Olympia is known prior to the contest.

41. Calves can’t grow but are genetic for the most part.

42. You can build big legs without squats.

43. Push-ups are easier on the shoulders than dips and bench presses.

44. Most of the steroids that gym rats rely on are from the lowest quality and basically suck.

45. Every professional bodybuilder either lies about not using steroids or reveals only 1/10 of what he/she actually uses.

46. Most female bodybuilders are ugly and grotesque looking. They need medical help more than the male bodybuilders.

47. Most bodybuilders got into bodybuilding because they had poor relationships with their fathers and felt insecure. They started bodybuilding to un-pussy themselves. They failed.

48. Many Mr. Olympia winners took the title without deserving it.

49. Dorian Yates set the new standards thanks to insulin and growth hormone.

50. Mark Rippetoe makes people fatter.

51. CrossFit may be popular but for the most part it’s nothing more than mainstream garbage based on people’s need to fit in a mainstream garbage.

52. The snatch and the clean & jerk don’t build as much muscle as the slow lifts.

53. You should never read bodybuilding magazines except for amusement.

54. You can’t have 21 inches arms naturally. A realistic goal for a natural would be 16 inches.

55. You can’t bench press 405 lbs naturally unless you a fat fuck or some sort of real mutant.

56. All post 40s weightlifting records have been set with the help of anabolic steroids.

57. The popular muscular old men taking selfies are all on drugs.

58. You can’t gain an inch on your arms in a month.

59. People usually don’t make good friends at the gym. Don’t know why.

60. Powerlifters just like bodybuilders are on a lot of drugs regardless of what they say.

61. Straight barbell curls suck for biceps and just kill your wrists. Use dumbbells.

62. Vince Gironda’s dips and neck press are some of the most disgusting things you can do to your shoulder joints.

63. You can’t gain muscle and lose fat at the same time without steroids.

64. Eating red meat does not make you a real man.

65. You can reach your maximum muscular potential as far as the upper body is concerned without ever going to the gym. Bodyweight exercises can take you there.

66. The muscle pump does not equal growth.

67. Training more than 4 times a week is absolutely not needed.

68. Training splits could be effective but most suck. Push, pull, legs is the best.

69. Ronnie Coleman’s biceps routine sucks for naturals.

70. Branch Warren’s exercise form is an example of what to never do in the gym.

71. Most fitness celebrities on YouTube are on TRT, tren and take fat cutting agents such as clenbuterol.

72. The diet method IIFYM {if it fits your macros} was made up by fake naturals on steroids who want you to believe that the source of your foods is not all that important. They’re wrong.

73. You need pre-workout drinks only if you can’t eat bananas.

74. A workout should not take more than an hour.

75. Training to failure is as stupid as watching TV to failure.

76. Deadlifting heavy more than once a week is an overkill.

77. Squatting every day is not needed for progress and those who insist on doing it have too much free time to do stupid stuff and are often on steroids, of course.

78. GTG is one of the best ways to improve your pull-ups.

79. Ring pull-ups are the best variation and will keep your elbows and wrist safe.

80. Wide grip pull-ups suck for lats. Close grip is much better.

81. Functional training is a subjective term. What is functional for one thing could be completely nonfunctional for another.

82. Big muscles are not meant to compensate for other things that could be small. Sometimes, however, muscularity does wonders.

83. Taking BCAA when you are already eating high protein foods is like eating sugar after eating a cake.

84. Women with 8 packs and 3D delts are not natural.

85. You don’t need to buy bodybuilding books.

86. Bodybuilding will not make you a good fighter but it can help.

87. Even vitamins and fish oil are not needed, if your diet is good.

88. It’s really hard to find joint supplements that actually do help your joints. So far placebo is the best joint supplement.

89. Tendonitis is often caused by emotional pain. Look for TMS solutions.

90. Masturbation won’t hinder gains provided that you do it in moderation as in less than 20 times a day.

91. Big muscles could make a girl stay for the night, but personality and character can keep her until you are both old and ugly.

92. In 99% of the cases fat people are fat because they eat a lot of junk food – not because of genetics.

93. When you are lean your penis appears larger because there’s no belly hiding it. Congrats.

94. Most ectomorphs are skinny fat – not skinny ripped.

95. An IFBB pro could spend up to USD 20, 000 a month on drugs.

96. Bodybuilding is controlled by secret societies.

97. Most IFBB pros don’t even take the supplements they advertise cause they know supplements suck.

98. You need deload phases in order to make progress. One step backwards is needed to make two steps forward.

99. Geared powerlifting is a pointless activity.

100. Bodybuilders need to learn how to be more spiritual because sooner or later – it’s game over and the gains go away. What do you then when you are all about the material stuff?

7 comments

  1. pete

    absolutely love this list! funny but truth at the same time tho.
    only thing i dont agree with is the training to failure. i might be wrong. explain please so i might get a better idea why you meant its pointless.

  2. Nate

    Pete failure training burns out your CNS which is where strength comes from. The CNS also takes much longer to recover than your muscles will. Training to failure on the last set of single joint movements isn’t so bad but it definitely shouldn’t be done every set or with compound movements.

  3. Nattykidsuck

    The Bcaa/protein, sugar/cake analogy was goofy on a few different levels, both in terms of writing style/ word choice, and on a bio/chem level which will allow an astute reader to ascertain how much you really know about the subject matter.

    Keep it ”natty.”

  4. TheDude

    This list is awesome!
    But i have a simple question whats the best push pull leg variation for example push-rest-pull-rest-legs ?

  5. Paul

    “54. You can’t have 21 inches arms naturally. A realistic goal for a natural would be 16 inches.”

    Only 16 inches ? That’s simply false. I’ve had 15 inches when I was 15, after a year of wrestling. A kid, not fat at all, quite the oposite. At 26 years old (95 kg, 1.76 m) I’ve had 19 inches arms after some years of bb.

    “55. You can’t bench press 405 lbs naturally unless you a fat fuck or some sort of real mutant.”

    Really ? 🙂 I wasn’t a fat fuck nor a mutant and I bench pressed 430 lbs (195 kg) at my 26. No steroids. Didn’t have, didn’t want. For what ? I was the best in my county (from a distant east-european country).

    “56. All post 40s weightlifting records have been set with the help of anabolic steroids.”

    That’s realy false. I’m 42 and I still bench press 440 lbs (200 kg) with a little to medium training (because of my job). My peak was at 36 (485 lbs, 220 kg). Never used stero. Believe or not some rare things still happen.

  6. Paul

    “75. Training to failure is as stupid as watching TV to failure.”

    Wrong. I always trained the last 2 sets to failure. Failure means that I’m not capable doing one more rep without help. Very good results expecialy in strenght. One week rest for body part and you are safe to do it.

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