The Biggest Bodybuilding Illusions Ever

In the post below are presented some of the biggest bodybuilding illusions/delusions ever. We are talking about illusionary beliefs in things and concepts that just aren’t true. Regardless of their validity, the myths underneath continue to spread from mouth to mouth.

bodybuilding-lies

1. You need 2-3 grams of protein per lbs of bodyweight to get big.

2. “I can help you put an inch on your arms in a week.“, says every training guru looking to make a buck.


3. “All bodybuilders on testosterone are natural because testosterone comes from nature, and anybody who takes testosterone is simply putting more nature inside of him. That person is therefore natural.“, is thinking every fake natty while pinning them glutes.

4. “You can get as big as Ronnie Coleman naturally. It just takes more time.”, wrote an anonymous poster on the forum of T-Nation.com.

5. “I only need to drop 20 lbs and I will be shredded“, said the 30% BF kid that went from 150 lbs to 220 lbs in three months as recommended by the bulking authorities on Starting Strength.com.

6. “A calorie is a calorie.”, said the shredded fake natty while injecting Trenbolone prior to a McDonald’s visit.

7. “I would look the same without steroids because they’re just the finishing touch.“, thinks every pro while telling the delusional kids that he is natural.

8. “I cut my drugs 2 weeks prior to a contest, therefore I am natural.”, said a fake natty to himself while posting a link to the web site of his new supplement company sponsor.

9. “Dana Linn Bailey is as natural as they make them.“, said George Farah.

10. “You are probably not eating enough and that’s why you’re not big.”, said Phil Heath to a 19 year old who took his shirt off during a seminar, so that his physique can be evaluated by pro builders on grams of anabolic steroids.

11. “An adult male weighs at least 200 pounds.“, wrote Mark Rippetoe while completely ignoring that an adult male can weight much less than 200 lbs and still be a REAL man.

12. “Milk is quite literally better than steroids for a novice lifter to grow on, and no supplement produces the same effect.”, said Mark Rippetoe prior to initiating his massive program meant to create a super race consisting of skinny fat bastards with 315 squats (1.2 BW).

Related article: GOMAD – as good as anabolic STEROIDS?

13. “The big and shredded CrossFit dudes are natural, because they do CrossFit.“, posted a skinny dude in defense of his heroes Rich Froning and Miranda Oldroyd.

14. “I am doing squats, bench presses and deadlifts. That makes me superior to anybody who doesn’t. I am the best there is. All else is pussies.”, was thinking a teenager while writing a post on bodybuilding.com. The post was: “No squats!!!? Phaggot. U red. Negged.”

15. “I believe you can achieve this level of development, if you had the right genetics and take supplements every day.”, commented a delusional teen under a photo of Simeon Panda.

16. “It was nice pump workout. I am quite happy that my arms will be toned for the clubs. Women will be ‘miring! Can’t wait!“, was never said by a single Don Juan ever.

17. “Fertile eggs are as effective as anabolic steroids.”, said Vince Gironda while knowing very well that all of his popular clients are on steroids.

18. “Once you get really big muscles, everything will follow – love, money, career…You will be the happiest person in the world.“, says the devil in your ears when you are thinking about starting a steroid cycle.

19. “I just did 30 minutes of cardio, so it’s perfectly fine to eat a 500 kcal chocolate bar.“, keeps on saying the person that can’t lose weight.

20. “Arnold Schwarzenegger took D-bol only 1-2 weeks prior to competitions.”, said Pinocchio.

21. “I want to lose fat. That’s why I need to remove all fat foods from my diet.“, said a fatty without realizing that fast carbs and overall calories are the main reason for gaining fat.

22. “I workout and I take my multi-vitamins every day. I don’t have to worry about anything. My health will be just fine.“, said a delusional teen after another night of all out drinking.

23. “If I stop taking steroids, I will keep all of my muscle gains. All I have to do is keep lifting and taking more supplements.“, is thinking the average fake natty after getting fired and losing ability to buy anabolic steroids.

24. “Bodybuilders eat clean all the time and stay 4% BF all year because of supreme genetics.“, said Pinocchio.

25. “Bodybuilding sucks. Powerlifting is where it’s at.”, said a teen after looking in the mirror and seeing his uncle’s belly above his genitalia.

26. “After I bench 2 plates, squat 3 plates and deadlift 4 plates I will have the right to post on Starting Strength.com.“, wrote a teen under annual plans.

27. “If I eat ultra clean food and do the Get-Big-And-Shredded program, I will be able to burn fat and gain muscle at the same time.“, said a teen after reading a 20m long page on the Internet advertising an e-book which usually costs USD 2, 999, but just today is available for USD 29.

28. “Big muscles are gay.“, said the 95 pounds weakling after choosing to play one more hour of Battlefield 4 instead of going to the gym.

29. “I will buy 50 Cents’ and LL Cool J’s workouts. I want them gangsta ghetto muscles.“, said a teen while rapping on a deodorant in front of his parent’s bathroom mirror.

30. “I think it has grown 1/8 of an inch.“, said a boy after his first biceps workout.

31. “People that don’t lift, don’t deserve to live.“, are thinking all weightlifting snobs.

32. “I will be growing as a weed as soon as I start getting that extra test from squats and deads.“, said a boy after reading on the Internet that squats and deads increase your testosterone levels.

33. “I found your steroids.“, said a worried mom to her son after locating whey protein powder in his bedroom.

34. “I found your cocaine. Care to share some?“, said the happy brother of a looking to get swollen boy after locating some creatine residue on the kitchen table.

35. “Why are you crying, son?“, said Mrs. Robinson to her son.

Yesterday, I forgot to take my BCAA dose after my workout. My biceps are 1/100 smaller. FML!“, replied the son.

36. “Bodybuilders don’t wear thongs.“, said Pinocchio.

37.  “I am not attracted to muscular lean men.“, said the 20 year old wife of a local businessman with 50 inch belly.

38. “Phil Heath responds to my comments on Facebook. He must really care about his fans.“, said a bodybuilding fan who wrote a comment under one of Phil Heath’s new product related posts.

39. “Ronnie Coleman says it ain’t nothing but a peanut.“, said a bodybuilder with 10 years of experience prior to deadlifting 225 lbs for 1 rep.

40. “I don’t want to look big. I just want to be strong and look like shit.“, said no one ever {at least not with those words}.

41. “If I do 3 000 sit-ups, I will get abs like Christiano Ronaldo.“, said a fatty while eating two double cheeseburgers and a diet coke.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *